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Month: June 2014

Quotes June 2014

Quotes June 2014

“Knowing how to love someone is different from admiring them. Admiration asks little of us, save for a lively imagination. The problems come when we try to build a shared life, which might include a home, children and the running of a business and household, with the person we had at first esteemed from afar. It’s then we need to draw on qualities that seldom spring forth naturally and almost invariably benefit from a little practice: an ability to listen properly to another person, patience, curiosity, resilience, sensuality and reason.” – Alain de Botton

“People don’t realize that when someone opens a door for you, they want to see whether you’re proactive or not. They are not going to hold your hand and walk you through it.” – Florencia Di Sarli

“Success can be measured by answering this question: How long have you stayed in the game playing by your own rules?” – Carlos Miceli

“Once you discover one simple fact and that is, everything around you that you call life was made up by people that were no smarter than you… And you can change it, you can influence it, you can build your own thing that other people can use… That’s maybe the most important thing. Is to shake off this erroneous notion that life is there and you are just gonna live in it..Once you learn that, you’ll never be the same again.” – Steve Jobs

“Our eyesight is here as a test to see if we can see beyond it. Matter is here as a test for our curiosity. Doubt is here as an exam for our vitality.” – Waking Life

“We need to retool, we don’t need to rebuild. This stuff is hard. You’ve got to stay together if you’ve got the guts. You don’t find the first door and run out of it.” – Pat Riley

“The challenge is to rewrite the agenda for commissioning so that art can start serving our psychological needs as effectively as it served those of theology or state ideologies for centuries. We should dare to conceive of art as more than just the fruits of the irregular imaginations of artists. We should channel and co-opt artworks to the direct task of helping us achieve self-knowledge, remember forgiveness, and love. It’s not that art is not appealing. It’s just that we don’t actually turn to it with any regularity when we want effective help.” – Alain de Botton

“There’s something very sweet about seeing amateurs running big things. It shows the opportunity you have in life if you commit to work in becoming a detail-oriented professional.” – Carlos Miceli

“Growth occurs when we discover how to remain authentically ourselves in the presence of potentially threatening things. Maturity is the possession of coping skills: we can take in our stride things that previously would have knocked us off course.” – Alain de Botton

“Soldiers are more loyal to their comrades and die for them, than to their country. Academics are more loyal to their peers than to truth.” – Nassim Taleb

“The reason that deep effort holds an appeal is that so much in modern knowledge work reduces to chattering interpretations — responding quickly to e-mail threads, bullet point self-promotion in PowerPoint slides, relentless online branding and ceaseless networking. Boasting is what a boy does, because he has no real effect in the world. At some point, we tire of the shallow – necessary as it might be – and foster a desire to retreat into depth, create the best possible thing we’re capable of creating, then step back, point, and remark simply: “I did that.”” – Cal Newport

“We should never assume that sitting on a sofa watching television or finding the right temperature in bed will be simple. We should stop the obsessive Romantic focus on ‘emotional’ issues. A good relationship means – almost above all else – a successful relationship around space and administration. When a relationship gets going, we therefore need not only to speak of our emotions and our childhoods, we need extended seminars between couples around dishwashers and laundry baskets, bed times and ventilation methods. More relationships have foundered over the management of the toilet than over the dynamics of the heart.” – Alain de Botton

“Cheerfulness is an achievement, and hope is something to celebrate. If optimism is important, it’s because many outcomes are determined by how much we bring to the task. This flies in the face of the elite view that talent is the primary requirement of a good life, but in many cases the difference between success and failure is determined by nothing more than our sense of what is possible and the energy we can muster to convince others of our due. We might be doomed not by a lack of skill, but by an absence of hope.” – Alain de Botton

“The difference between understanding and internalizing is the difference between talking and doing.” – Carlos Miceli

“Art helps us accomplish a task that is of central importance in our lives: to hold on to things we love when they are gone.” – Alain de Botton

“A heuristic on whether you have control of your life: can you take naps?” – Nassim Taleb

“If you see fraud and don’t say fraud, you are a fraud.” – Nassim Taleb

“Pre was troubled by knowing that a mediocre effort can win a race and a magnificent effort can lose one. Winning a race wouldn’t necessarily demand that he give it everything he had from start to finish. He never ran any other way. I tried to get him to, God knows I tried… but… Pre was stubborn. He insisted on holding himself to a higher standard than victory. ‘A race is a work of art’; that’s what he said, that’s what he believed and he was out to make it one every step of the way. Of course he wanted to win. Those who saw him compete and those who competed against him were never in any doubt how much he wanted to win. But how he won mattered to him more. Pre thought I was a hard case. But he finally got it through my head that the real purpose of running isn’t to win a race. It’s to test to the limits of the human heart. That he did… Nobody did it more often. Nobody did it better.” — Bill Bowerman

“In adulthood, when we first say we long for love, what we predominantly mean is that we want to be loved as we were once loved by a parent. We want a recreation in adulthood of what it felt like to be ministered to and indulged. In a secret part of our minds, we picture someone who will understand our needs, bring us what we want, be immensely patient and sympathetic to us, act selflessly and make it all better. This is – naturally – a disaster. For a marriage to work, we need to move firmly out of the child – and into the parental position. We need to become someone who will be willing to subordinate their own demands and concerns to the needs of another.” – Alain de Botton

“The worst part of entrepreneurship is coming up with names.” – Carlos Miceli

“A friend is a person with whom I may be sincere. Before him I may think aloud. I am arrived at last in the presence of a man so real and equal, that I may drop even those undermost garments of dissimulation, courtesy, and second thought, which men never put off, and may deal with him with the simplicity and wholeness with which one chemical atom meets another. Sincerity is the luxury allowed, like diadems and authority, only to the highest rank, that being permitted to speak truth, as having none above it to court or conform unto.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

On Paternalism

On Paternalism

Paternalism is like sugar.

At first, it feels good to blame your parents, your teachers, your bosses, your governors, etc. for what you feel is wrong. But in reality, you’re just hurting yourself. You’re acknowledging (loudly) that you feel powerless and with no control about how to improve the things you don’t like about your life or the world.

Like sugar, you don’t feel the consequences of paternalism right away. But like sugar, your willpower and capacity for self-reliance gets weaker and weaker every time you do it, until you see yourself as a victim.

Being a victim is a choice. Just stop eating paternalism sugar.

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